What you see here is a baby chupacabra. He is, um, sleeping. A sleeping baby chupacabra. It is no wonder that the chupacabra is an endangered species because people are picking sleeping baby chupacabras out of their nests and handling them. You should know that if you touch a baby chupacabra, its mother will stop loving it. Then you will have to raise it yourself. Several times a day, you will have to cut open a goat’s neck and hand the baby chupacabra a straw. This will make you unpopular in the goat community, but I don’t make the rules. Maybe you will find a nice, understanding goat, I don’t know. You could barter. It’s possible.

This particular baby chupacabra turned out not to be very active, so the goat got off easy.

In other news, as I was trying to sleep last night, I kept thinking of my friend, the Starship Enterprise. I kept picturing him with a damaged hull, and honestly, when has he NOT had a damaged hull? That thing has been blown up more times than good heavens I can’t think of a comparison on the spur of the moment but something good, and it looks like that is his fate again in the upcoming movie with the hotter Captain Kirk. Blowing up the Enterprise is a multimillion-dollar enterprise.


  1. Jess says:

    That was a very profound post! It almost felt like a religious experience!

  2. Jeffrey C says:

    Keep your hands off and damaged hull. And your twisted tractor beams.

  3. Christina V says:

    The Starship Enterprise is a she! A she, damnit! A she with a damaged hull.

    On another note, maybe the baby chupacabra could hug and pet the goat before it sucked its blood. Possibly, at least according to some, if it did that it could remain a vegetarian.

    • David says:

      The Starship Enterprise is transgender.

      And I think it would be up to the human to hug the goat for the baby chupacabra. 🙂

  4. Pua says:

    You see…here, where I live, which is very, very close to Chupacabra Central, we cater more to the goat than the goat-eater. Which is also why the market on the Salad Shooter is cornered here.

    Did I hear a rumor that you were going to be out this way? Perhaps on a Chupacabra photographic safari?

    Christine and I are like-minded when it comes to the Enterprise.

    I forgive your captcha. 😉

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