06.11.2005
Sibling Rivalry

If anyone wants to buy my old car—Ellen Ettoinne VIII, M.D.—she’s available. Ellen is a silver 2004 Mazda3 hatchback who is perfect in every way except she had the bad fortune of not being born a gas-electric hybrid, a requirement for my new business.

I love Ellen and will miss her. Until I find her a new home, I own two cars at once. This has never happened before, and I am trying not to pit them against each other, but it’s hard.

“You know, Ellen, if you got sixty miles per gallon, I wouldn’t have to put you up for adoption."

“Prudence, why can’t you have the rich styling of your sister, Ellen?”

They may need therapists instead of mechanics, but at least I keep things interesting.

Luckily, Goblin is an only child.

posted by David at 8:39 PM
Comments

Well, she would have to be! Who could hold a candle to her?!!!

posted by: Hanuman on 06.12.2005 at 11:02 AM

Just so you know, my new business requires that I buy a house and outfit it with all sorts of cool energy generating/saving devices.

posted by: Amy on 06.12.2005 at 11:43 PM

Well, really, in the case of sibling rivalry, Ellen probably always wins. She can basically end every argument with: I'm sorry, Prudence, how did you get your oh-so-masculine name again?

posted by: GusGus on 06.13.2005 at 9:18 AM

This seems like a good time to point out that Penn Jillette named his daughter "Moxie Crimefighter Jillette".

Also, I want to see your new car.

posted by: jwer on 06.13.2005 at 12:18 PM

I never named a car nor had any impulse to name a car. Is there something wrong with me?

posted by: David on 06.13.2005 at 4:55 PM

Hanuman: I held a candle to her once. For some time after that, she regretted wearing so much hairspray.

Amy: You're absolutely correct. It's in your contract. Better sign your life away, quick!

GusGus: Ellen would not stoop to such an ungenerous comment. It says a lot about you, GusGus, that you would think of it.

Jwer: He stole the name from me. Moxie Crimefigher Jilette is what I named a spider plant that I met when I was climbing K2 back in aught four.

David: Why do you ask these questions when you already know the answer?

posted by: David on 06.13.2005 at 8:45 PM

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