Oh yeah, I have a blog. And it’s 2008. How are you, 2008? I have to say, from my perspective, you are shaping up nicely but then again I’m on drugs and trying to ignore the horror show that is Hillary Clinton’s campaign.

Blog, I’m sorry you have been such a ghost town lately but 2008 got in the way. Also you are stupid and ugly and no one reads you anymore. Who the heck wants to see three thousand photographs of a chupacabra?

Tonight I am going to the art school to give a presentation and participate in a panel discussion. The title is, “The Sidewalk: It’s Not Rocket Science,” and the subtitle is “Why Do You Damned Art School Students Always Stomp through My Front Garden?” There may be a subsection about the orange peels I find in the soil at least once a week. I was not aware that the Orange Peel Fairy was such a frequent visitor to these here parts.

Also I think my ear was on television last week. My eyebrow is so jealous.